skyline + patels = great time

a good weekend in the nati. here's mrs. wintermute with mom and dad wintermute.

click here to see all the pics.

a fun 48 hours in the nati. catching an earlier flight on friday out of atl paid off as we were home for dinner while our original flight was delayed for two hours. on the way home, our flight out of dayton left late, allowing us 14 minutes to catch our connection. 14 minutes to get out of the turbo prop jet on the runway, wait for our gate-checked luggage, and then get from the B terminal to the A terminal. it is ridiculous to even try. katie ran off the plane and sprinted ahead to convince the gate agent to hold our plane. meanwhile i stayed behind, waited for our two roller bags, then became That Guy Who Sprints Down the Escalator and Runs Like OJ Through the Terminal. just as the gate agent is shaking her head and telling katie, "i'm sorry, we can't wait any longer" i stagger to gate. apparently, the agent told katie that if i was not there by the time our boarding passes finished printing we would not get on the plane.

while planning our wedding over the past year, my parents had decided they want to throw a second reception in the hometown with their friends. at the time, i didn't really want to do it. however, in retrospect, it turned out to be one of the wisest investments in the entire wedding process. everytime my parents and i disagreed (which compared to most folks, was not that often), i offered the compromise, "well, you can do it your way at the cincinnati reception." and it settled just about every debate.

having just finished the celebration, i can't believe that i even considered not going along with my parents' plan. it made them so happy to celebrate with their friends and community. and their friends did an amazing job, putting in countless hours. my dad taught himself to use picassa to make a slide show, my mom designed and made the decorations, and they had a ton of help along the way. these family friends are unbelievably generous, and i made my entire toast to them.

at the same time, i did walk away feeling a little bit disconnected from my parents. about a year ago i half-jokingly told wintermute senior that i was pretty sure that i was turning into him. he disagreed and said that i was a really different person from him (which i still disagree with). saturday night seemed to highlight the point. i had a blast and loved being with family, and most of all, seeing how happy the whole event made my parents. however, it's not how i would have celebrated. in fact, i spent the last two hours of the evening sitting outside with katie and sunir while the grown-ups danced to desi hip hop. partly, this was b/c i rarely get to see my brother, partly b/c that just isn't my thing. also, my mom's friends made a gorgeous display with ghanesh. i felt uncomfortable taking pictures of in front of it (as some well-meaning folks wanted to do) because i really just don't believe in it. in fact, i think it's kind of blasphemous when indians, or anyone really, genuflect and suddenly become religious just for one day or moment. i've been to indian weddings where the bride and/or groom didn't even understand their ceremony, yet there they were, taking vows to honor krishna, etc. or friends who took vows to raise their kids in the catholic church b/c it was required by the ceremony even they knew they had NO intention of ever doing so (props to my cousin henrik, who flat out told the priest at his wedding last march that he didn't intend to raise his kids in the catholic church. when the priest asked why not, he replied, "b/c if i have a daugher i don't want her to be a second class citizen in her own church."). i mean, does the pomp and circumstance mean that much to a person that they will say anything to get it? it demeans the faith of those who actually believe.

ok, enough ranting.

the great part of a weekend home is getting to relax patel-style.

dad + soham (his oldest brother), doing what they do best

parimal (the 2nd oldest brother), on the couch, as i have known him for most of my life

mrs. wintermute is still getting used to it. she was a great sport about the entire weekend, even donning desi-wear.

mom helping mrs. wintermute get ready

her parents seemed to handle my family really well. the main thing that takes getting used to is that we spend every minute of every day together and eat every meal together (this is not apparently how all families operate).

and what do we do with all of this time? sit on couch and make fun of each other, mainly. and eat.

one particularly noxious habit of the patels (and many indians, i suspect) is that the men sit on their asses while the women do all of the work. it drives me nucking futs. i'm not sure what's worse: that the men always do it or that the women seem ok with it!

at the end of the day, it counts as family time, that's all that matters.