lucho libre

lucho libres doing our pre-game

ok, finally, got some pics.

check out a great collection of them here, thanks to fox.

so, here's the deal. land in soflo around 10 after flying back all day from vegas. grab my car (thanks to moe for mailing me my spare key from atl) and get to miami beach. the boys are waiting for me at lincoln park at a hookah bar. a shot of korean vodka (which is disgusting) and a cold beer await. they're done in a minute. haven't seen the bachelor since my wedding. turns out master schmaster is newly single. ballslapper (ok cockchaser, as he was known around the house in college), fox, and the player are there, as well has two of the bachelor's fiance's friends.

from there we are off the clevelandar, a hotel + outdoor bar in the heart of south beach. the boys find some chicks. meanwhile, cockchaser earns himself a new nickname: ballslapper. it's a seemingly gentle taps to the crotch, but it hurts like a bitch. everyone is tagged. i'm on ball watch the rest of the weekend.

from the clevelandar to wet willies for some call-a-cabs (grain plus some slushee stuff). late night pizza. while there, we dial some of the other boys and leave messages. yes, drunk dialing is still fun. at 4:00 am, i am cooked. a few hold outs hit a club. turns out to make atlanta's clermont lounge (here's all you need to know from wiki: "The Clermont is perhaps best-known for featuring dancers who do not meet the traditional physical standards for strippers, the most famous of which is Blondie, notable for her ability to completely flatten empty beer cans between her breasts.") look classy by comparison. glad that i opted out of it.

crash till noon the next day, crawl to jerry's deli for $14 mile high reubens.

make our way to south beach and work off the hangovers. the scenery is, uhh, scenic.

top optional beach. the player, the bachelor and the ballslapper opt to go topless.

our drunk dialing pays off. turns out we called captain caveman the prior night. well, mrs. caveman is in miami beach on a bachelorette party, and the bachelorette is a friend of ours from college. she invites us to join them at taverna opa (here it is on google maps). we didn't really have a good plan, so this sounds good.

i'm the last one to arrive. as i walk up, i think i'm at the wrong place for dinner. loud music. making the earth shattering. bowel quaking. a line. a velvet rope. what?

opening shot at opa

the door guy lets me in when i point to my crew and they wave at me. i walk in and about a dozen chicks dancing on the table wave at me. i like this place.

the boys are in the back chowing on grub and drinking ouzo straight from the bottle. we hang with mrs. caveman and her ladies, but they have other plans for the night. shit. a sausage fest. 8 dudes by themselves is not that great at this place.

the bachelor steps to the plate. he spots 7 chicks outside waiting for a table. goes to talk to them. turns out they're a bachelorette party. he grabs them, brings them in, gets them food and drinks, and ask the manager for an extra table.

now, i have to give props to the staff at opa. they're only concern is making sure we have a good time. in fact, they're having a good time with us. the bus boys are dancing on the tables. the waiter is bring a bucket of beer every 15 minutes. people are throwing paper napkins in the air (yeah, doesn't sound that crazy, but you had to be there). the bass is pumping.

a good sign

fox would not be outdone.

the whole crew. the money shot is stage right. ballslapper is bending this chick over while smiling at the camera. meanwhile, the player looks on in admiration.

now here's where it gets better. master schmaster has brough lucho libre masks for everyone. the opa wait staff loves it. the manager comes out to take his picture with us.

surprisingly, the chicks thought this was weird.

wintermute and the dj. he thought the masks were sweet.

to their credit, the chicks call it a night while we're still having fun. always go out on top, i say.

we head to the sheldon for karaoke. we take over the stage. i love watching master schmaster rush the stage and rock baby got back.



it's done by 4:45. ballslapper heads straight to the airport to catch his 6:30 flight.

we sleep till noon. get lunch at lincoln park.

at 5 it's time to pick up dr. wintermute, who's been at a wedding. i've to kind of explain to her what i've been doing all weekend.