rusty trombone

a long time ago, bloodninja, mrs wintermute, jwatt and others had a particular set of inside jokes. they revolved around who could one-up each other with strange stories of deranged sexual practices.

the big joke was that whenever we had to explain to someone why we laughed so hard everytime someone mentioned "dirty sanchez" or "warm carl," we would turn to bloodninja to explain. he would look at his shoes, blush a bit, and then launch into, "well, you see, it starts with..."

here's a link to a nice summary of the lexicon.

it is also quite funny to submit all of these phrases when playing charades and watch someone try to act out 'strawberry milkshake.'

two years later, i'm sitting in the waiting room of JP morgan in midtown manhattan with 40 other eager beaver mba-types. making small talk. one of the guys sitting next to me looks at me and says, "i'm not sure why i feel i can share this with you, but do you know what 'smashing pumpkins' is?"

"err, no." but i am intrigued.

"well, its where you microwave a pumpkin for 3 minutes so it's warm and pulpy inside. then you cut a hole and fuck it. it feels just like the real thing."

wait, did you say you fuck a pumpkin? oh that is awesome. i gotta call bloodninja, i gotta call mrs w.

wait, he just said fuck a pumpkin. i'm at an interview. i'm wearing my best, most conservative suit. he singled me out of the entire crowd and chose to share this sick (but entertaining) story. he doesn't know me. he's never seen me before. he doesn't know i like to submit these kind of entries in charades.

what on my face says, "i like to hear stories about depraved sexual practices?"